Wired.com has a story today about Bruce Townsley, a former social worker from Chicago who purchased an abandoned missile base in Abilene, Texas, for $99,000 in 1997.

He has since turned the 2,200 sq. ft. underground Cold War relic into a “bachelor pad.” Pretty cool, right?

Too bad Bruce is an old, fast bastard who probably purchased the bunker because he is old, and well, fat.

Quoteworthy:

“You have to get used to living without windows. But I have a TV monitor [hooked up to] an aboveground video camera. It’s intensely quiet … and I’m a quiet freak. But there was a time when I had to keep a fan on all day just to have some noise.”

Sounds romantic.

In addition to being a semi-warped blogger, Blogging Boner also manages his very own fantasy football team.

Thanks to the dope right leg of Dallas Cowboys kicker, Nick Folk, Blogging Boner’s squad, BiggityBonesBrigage, earned the “Premium Player of the Week” from Heineken.

Sounds cool, right? (The Award. Blogging Boner knows his team name is super.)

Well, it’s not all it’s cracked up to be — there’s no free beer, blow-up dolls, er, furniture or other green flair.

Just a lame sign on a Web site that only 10 people read.

So lame, in fact, Blogging Boner had to share it with everyone who doesn’t read this site.